Skyrim Stan may not be the smartest Dragonborn around, but at least he’s keeping that knee protected!

SKYRIM STAN

Posted by Shawn Handyside on December 31, 2011 · 7:16 AM

(226 votes, average: 3.81 out of 5)

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Categories:
Advice Meme, Bethesda, Highly Illogical Captain, PC, Playstation, The Elder Scrolls, Weak Points, Xbox 360

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+49 Vote up Vote down

Dycro 105p · 691 weeks ago

So you took 99 arrows but not one to the knee? Well congratulations: you're not a cripple. However, I must also offer my condolences: you're dead.

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4 replies · active 691 weeks ago

+33 Vote up Vote down

GazzyW007 94p · 691 weeks ago

Depends how often he took the arrows. An arrow a day keeps the Civil War away!

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+8 Vote up Vote down

Mindlessinvalid 91p · 691 weeks ago

I would like to imagine that he took all 99 arrows to the knee at the same time.
or rather...
I WOULDN'T like to imagine that, getting an arrow wound once is painful enough.

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+7 Vote up Vote down

GazzyW007 94p · 691 weeks ago

Hey, my Skyrim Protag took an arrow to the neck in a fight. Didn't even blink.

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+5 Vote up Vote down

Solid_Snivy 63p · 691 weeks ago

I took a Seviper's fang to the knee, and I never complained. Of course, there were fangs all over me...and other things.

...never get drunk at a Pokemon frat party, kids.

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+39 Vote up Vote down

deleted7077262 93p · 691 weeks ago

I was looking for something funny and relevant. There were so many good things. But this one took the cake (it tied with a Batman's parents dying/Skyrim joke, but I saw this and told myself "THIS")

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9 replies · active 686 weeks ago

+30 Vote up Vote down

Prof. Luigi 100p · 691 weeks ago

"Then, son, my dad gave me this antique arrow, which got me in to archery. After that, I entered a world archery championship and won. I won a trophy and learned that valuable lesson that sports are so much more fulfilling than merely getting an achievement in a videogame. That son, is why I got out of Skyrim"

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+7 Vote up Vote down

Jerach 86p · 691 weeks ago

This story is totally unrealistic because video games are way better than sports. Right?

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-9 Vote up Vote down

Mindlessinvalid 91p · 691 weeks ago

Okay, let's just pretend for a moment, that you (as a skyrim player) and I (as an actual archer) attempted to duel to the death using the skill sets relevant to our respective hobbies..

I'm currently working on obtaining celtic Yew for a 178cm (roughly 6 foot long) longbow with a 4 cm(oops 6cm) cross section string with heavy duty artificial sinew.

Let's see how those thumbs and index fingers save you from a three bladed barbed hunting arrow fired from 1 and a half city blocks away (because I'm not freaking robin hood).

I haven't done the torsion calculations yet, so I don't know how much force the bow would yield in draw weight, but assuming that I hit your knee you probably won't even be good as a city guard anymore.

The cross section of the arrowhead is the size of a quarter (25 cents US currency for you foreigners).

Longbows can actually pierce plate armor somewhat reliably, and since you're dueling as a Skyrim player and NOT a SCR member.... You don't GET armor.
http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/586943

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+7 Vote up Vote down

Jerach 86p · 690 weeks ago

Listen... you hear that? That's the sound of the joke going over your head.

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+6 Vote up Vote down

Dycro 105p · 690 weeks ago

I can hear it, it makes a sound like "Fuuus"

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-9 Vote up Vote down

Mindlessinvalid 91p · 690 weeks ago

All I heard was the sound of an incredibly lame attempt at humor by feigned ignorance in response to a meme that isn't funny in the first place.

Also, my response was in it's own right, a joke that went over YOUR head.
I see no need to make accommodations for Poes Law, because if someone can't tell the difference between satirical response and genuine idiocy they're probably mentally retarded.

Johnathan Swift didn't use emoticons in "A Modest Proposal" so why should I?

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+3 Vote up Vote down

Jerach 86p · 690 weeks ago

I was making a blatantly sarcastic statement because I wanted to make a joke considering that this is a site for humor. You seemed to take what I said very seriously and literally as you went into a long explanation about how you with your amazing skills, bow, and arrow, would be able to easily take me on in one-on-one combat.

You now attempt to pass off what you just said as a joke which leaves us with two possibilities. What you said was not a joke and you're just trying to cover your ass, or you think that jokes involve a large degree of technical information and leaving out any resemblance to any actual attempt at humor.

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-12 Vote up Vote down

Mindlessinvalid 91p · 690 weeks ago

If you think something like that can't possibly be a joke, then you've probably never read a Modest Proposal or even know who Johnathan Swift was.

My post was a form of Horatian Satire where an insincere premise and discourse was presented as a serious argument. The outlandish level of detail as well as the seemingly pointless premise were a dead giveaway.

Again, I'll start using emoticons and other ways to denote sarcasm/satire/humor when someone points out to me those same features in something like the letter by alexander pope that prefaced "Rape of the Lock" or "A Modest Proposal" by Johnathan Swift.

I don't see why you got all riled up over it anyways, nothing was particularly funny about your response to "Prof.Weegee." If anything, my response made your funnier because it provided a reaction to put the limited humor in context. Inherent humor is a myth indulged in by mongoloids without any concept of comedy, context and delivery can make anything funny (and are what makes something funny to begin with).

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+2 Vote up Vote down

Pupsrus13 77p · 686 weeks ago

I've nearly been shot by an arrow.... it wasn't a hunting arrow, it was a practice arrow.

The guy who shot the arrow was either drunk or stoned, and it went right past my ear. It was so close the end of the arrow (the part that's nocked on the bowstring) left a cut on my ear.

If THAT hurt, I can only imagine what YOUR bow could do.... death by arrow in knee sounds like the most likely option.

Did I mention I dislike sharp objects stuck in me?

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+30 Vote up Vote down

Wetmang 95p · 691 weeks ago

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4 replies · active 691 weeks ago

+11 Vote up Vote down

TheInsaneWombat 90p · 691 weeks ago

Quick! Send him to TvTropes! He might get trapped there!
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HornyV...

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+10 Vote up Vote down

Doctor Rover 91p · 691 weeks ago

OH NO IT BACKFIRED!

NOW I AM STUCK THERE AS SOON AS I CLOSE THIS TAB D:

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+9 Vote up Vote down

Prof. Luigi 100p · 691 weeks ago

NO! DOCTOR!

...It's too late. He's gone.
*Sad gameover music*

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+5 Vote up Vote down

Deep Thought 105p · 691 weeks ago

I vote this as better than the ones above.

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+19 Vote up Vote down

primedawg9170 92p · 691 weeks ago

I used to take an arrow to the knee, but then I brought knee pads. Now I am invincible to everything arrow related.

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2 replies · active 691 weeks ago

+24 Vote up Vote down

The Pualrus 100p · 691 weeks ago

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+7 Vote up Vote down

k3man 87p · 691 weeks ago

'Cept for the occasional Lucksman shot

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+15 Vote up Vote down

TheInsaneWombat 90p · 691 weeks ago

I had to try my hand at this.

That really was odd for me, considering the helmet was iron. I.e. that armor for people who smash things, not shoot things.

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2 replies · active 691 weeks ago

+10 Vote up Vote down

Prof. Luigi 100p · 691 weeks ago

Are there crosshair lenses in that iron helmet?

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+10 Vote up Vote down

Psycroc 103p · 691 weeks ago

WEAR NECKLACE

HOLY SHIT I FEEL LIKE I CAN SWING SWORDS BETTER NOW

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+9 Vote up Vote down

Mr. Castly™ 68p · 691 weeks ago

NO. NO NO NO NO NO. NONONO. NO.
PLEASE NO.

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10 replies · active 691 weeks ago

+39 Vote up Vote down

_JoJo_ 99p · 691 weeks ago

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+23 Vote up Vote down

primedawg9170 92p · 691 weeks ago

Ladies and mentlegen, I believe we have found our new Kratos Advice Meme. Please panic in an orderly fashion.

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+27 Vote up Vote down

GazzyW007 94p · 691 weeks ago

Aaaaaaaaah.
Aaaaaaaaah.
Aaaaaaaaah.

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+12 Vote up Vote down

Spencer 119p · 691 weeks ago

Alright, orderly fashion?

*takes out baton*

We'll need a maestro.
One, two...

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+10 Vote up Vote down

The Pualrus 100p · 691 weeks ago

A-one two three fAAUGH!
...
Okay, that was not order. That was an arrow.
I'm sorry, for someone seems to have taken a Huntsman to my spine. I can no longer carry out panicking in an orderly fashion.
Only the regular fashion.

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+9 Vote up Vote down

Spencer 119p · 691 weeks ago

Oh okay, in that case.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

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+10 Vote up Vote down

deleted7077262 93p · 691 weeks ago

I didn't quite hear you. Say again?

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+5 Vote up Vote down

Ovahdrive 105p · 691 weeks ago

Let me paraphrase.

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+5 Vote up Vote down

TheInsaneWombat 90p · 691 weeks ago

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ItciuejAle0&fe...

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+5 Vote up Vote down

Leo E. 114p · 691 weeks ago

NO.

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+8 Vote up Vote down

PortalMan 86p · 691 weeks ago

Another meme? Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure.

*Jumps off cliff*

*falls 2 feet*

*Lands in front of Giant.*

Shit.

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+8 Vote up Vote down

FlyingMug 69p · 691 weeks ago

Giants + Dwarven Sphere = Space Core?
FOR SCIENCE!

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+4 Vote up Vote down

Lordshadow 97p · 691 weeks ago

Had this post been two images and not used that horribly overused meme, it would probably be a full star higher.

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3 replies · active 691 weeks ago

+4 Vote up Vote down

Prof. Luigi 100p · 691 weeks ago

What would it have used then?

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+3 Vote up Vote down

Kris 81p · 691 weeks ago

one of these things is not like the others, one of these things isn't funny.
(crosses fingers praying I used proper grammar, and preparing fire spells for the trolls)

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+7 Vote up Vote down

Lordshadow 97p · 691 weeks ago

I used to use improper grammar,

but then I took an English class to not sound like an idiot

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+3 Vote up Vote down

dope92 94p · 691 weeks ago

guys i'm scared

i wanna join in to

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+3 Vote up Vote down

NotB0b 91p · 691 weeks ago

Gravity?
BITCH IMMA HORSE

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+3 Vote up Vote down

Shatman 96p · 691 weeks ago

I would like to draw everyone's attention to the following: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSDfxde8fSg&fe...

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+2 Vote up Vote down

Twilightdusk 76p · 690 weeks ago

If your having bow problems I feel bad for you son.

Got hit with 99 arrows but the knee? not one.

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+2 Vote up Vote down

SirNumel 97p · 691 weeks ago

Bethesda Softworks: Phuck Physics!

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0 Vote up Vote down

kcin2001 · 644 weeks ago

I actually shot someone in the in skyrim and he fell down some stairs.

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Comments by IntenseDebate

49 Comments

Mr. Castly™ on December 31st, 2011 7:33 am

NO. NO NO NO NO NO. NONONO. NO.
PLEASE NO.
Dycro on December 31st, 2011 7:36 am

So you took 99 arrows but not one to the knee? Well congratulations: you're not a cripple. However, I must also offer my condolences: you're dead.
primedawg9170 on December 31st, 2011 7:57 am

I used to take an arrow to the knee, but then I brought knee pads. Now I am invincible to everything arrow related.
AngelAreku on December 31st, 2011 8:29 am

I was looking for something funny and relevant. There were so many good things. But this one took the cake (it tied with a Batman's parents dying/Skyrim joke, but I saw this and told myself "THIS")
<img src="http://29.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_lwbaghcz3n1r0do2lo1_500.jpg">
FlyingMug on December 31st, 2011 9:29 am

Giants + Dwarven Sphere = Space Core?
FOR SCIENCE!
TheInsaneWombat on December 31st, 2011 10:48 am

I had to try my hand at this.

<img src='http://memegenerator.net/cache/instances/400x/12/12435/12733916.jpg'>

That really was odd for me, considering the helmet was iron. I.e. that armor for people who smash things, not shoot things.
Wetmang on December 31st, 2011 11:27 am

<img src=http://memegenerator.net/cache/instances/400x/12/12436/12734817.jpg>
Lordshadow on December 31st, 2011 12:31 pm

Had this post been two images and not used that horribly overused meme, it would probably be a full star higher.
Shatman on December 31st, 2011 1:05 pm

I would like to draw everyone's attention to the following: rel="nofollow"> rel="nofollow">…
SirNumel on December 31st, 2011 1:22 pm

Bethesda Softworks: Phuck Physics!
NotB0b on December 31st, 2011 6:12 pm

Gravity?
BITCH IMMA HORSE
PortalMan118 on December 31st, 2011 6:57 pm

Another meme? Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure.

*Jumps off cliff*

*falls 2 feet*

*Lands in front of Giant.*

Shit.
dope92 on December 31st, 2011 7:07 pm

rel="nofollow"> guys i'm scared

i wanna join in to
Twilightdusk on January 2nd, 2012 9:24 am

If your having bow problems I feel bad for you son.

Got hit with 99 arrows but the knee? not one.
kcin2001 on November 19th, 2012 11:55 pm

I actually shot someone in the in skyrim and he fell down some stairs.